Friday, 30 September 2011

Coping with a Breakup or Divorce - Moving on after a relationship ends

END is not the end. In fact END is 'Effort Never Dies'. And if u ever get a NO in answer, that means 'Next Opportunity'.

I stumbled upon this article, which has been in my possession for quite sometime.. Good reading..


It’s never easy when a marriage or other significant relationship ends. Whatever the reason for the split – and whether or not you wanted it – the breakup of a long-term, committed relationship can turn your whole world upside down and trigger all sorts of painful and unsettling feelings. But there are things you can do to get through this difficult time. Even in the midst of the sadness and stress of a divorce or breakup, you have an opportunity to learn from the experience and grow into a stronger, wiser person.

Learning important lessons from a divorce or breakup..

In times of emotional crisis, there is an opportunity to grow and learn. Just because you are feeling emptiness in your life right now, doesn’t mean that nothing is happening or that things will never change. Consider this period a time-out, a time for sowing the seeds for new growth. You can emerge from this experience knowing yourself better and feeling stronger.

In order to fully accept a breakup and move on, you need to understand what happened and acknowledging the part you played. It’s important to understand how the choices you made affected the relationship. Learning from your mistakes is the key to not repeating them.

Some questions to ask yourself:

Step back and look at the big picture. How did you contribute to the problems of the relationship?

Do you tend to repeat the same mistakes or choose the wrong person in relationship after relationship?

Think about how you react stress and deal with conflict and insecurities. Could you act in a more constructive way?

Consider whether or not you accept other people the way they are, not the way they could or “should” be.

Examine your negative feelings as a starting point for change. Are you in control of your feelings, or are they in control of you?

You’ll need to be honest with yourself during this part of the healing process. Try not to dwell on who is to blame or beat yourself up over your mistakes. As you look back on the relationship, you have an opportunity to learn more about yourself, how you relate to others, and the problems you need to work on. If you are able to objectively examine your own choices and behavior, including the reasons why you chose your former partner, you’ll be able to see where you went wrong and make better choices next time.


Psst.. For full article, please visit http://helpguide.org/mental/coping_divorce_relationship_breakup.htm
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Acknowledging your mistakes isn't bad at all.. Provided you learn something from your mistakes and improve yourself.. If God permits, you'll be surprised how you can suddenly save your relationship just in time before the road is about to come to its end... Depends on the cause you fight.. If you are fighting for your rights (legally, ethically-halalan thayyiban-speaking ;)), انشـــــاء الله God will help you.. tapi kalau setakat nak berebut laki orang ke sampai nak 'penaya' anak bini orang tu... الله pun tauuuuu.. Wallahua'lam... May الله protect all those around me from such misfortune... Amin..

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